Monday, September 26, 2005

Okay...here's the no underwear part........

This is the part that gets fun. I belong to a sort of social club that meets monthly in this area, composed of many people who really know how to enjoy their lives. We get together to attend a dance held in a local hotel, where many of us also spend the night so that we don't have to worry about how much alcohol we consume before the evening is over. We get there early, hang out by the pool and visit, go to dinner together in our little cliques, and then to to the dance about seven o' clock. There is always a fun theme for these events, and you can choose to dress up for it, or not. It's always more fun if you do, and everyone seems to really get into the spirit of things and get a little crazy.
When I was in high school, I was extremely shy. But it's true, I was always the fat girl with glasses and frizzy short hair, wearing my insecurity like a big fat sign on my considerable chest. I also felt uncoordinated, and would only dance slow dances, if I was lucky enough to get asked. I skulked in corners, back to the walls, trying not to make a spectacle of myself. When this comes up in conversation with my new friends, they look at me incredulously and say, "Oh yeah, riiiiiiiiiiiight!!!!!, ha ha ha, tell us another one!" They probably say this because when I was almost 50, I went through one of those mid-life things. I know, I know, it's pretty predictable--I never thought it would happen to me. I always did what was expected of me, did the right thing...but instead of rushing out to buy a sports car, I got my right nipple pierced. I should interject here that I had a breast reduction a few years prior to that, so this was not as brave a deed as it may seem. My sensitivity was greatly reduced due to the fact that they had to remove, reduce and reposition said nipple (and I became "Frankennipple" to my dear daughter) so the piercing wasn't that traumatic. But I finally felt good about my new, improved breasts, and thought why not enjoy them a little more? When my son got wind of what I'd done, he was more than a little disgusted with me. Oh well. All my life I had been soooo conservative. I wouldn't even wear a sleeveless blouse in the most miserable heat because I have fat arms. What a mess! But thanks to the mid-life thing, I thought "What the heck am I waiting for?" Like the beer commercial used to say, you only go around once in life. So, pierce the boob, ditch the bra and panties, grow my hair a little longer, go to clothing optional hot spring resorts, and stop worrying about what everyone thought of me. Yes, Middle Age Crazy.
You're probably wondering what all this has to do with the dances? I do tend to digress, but it's my blog and I can do whatever I want to do with it, right?
The theme of this particular dance happened to be "High Heels, Short Skirts, and NO Panties". Yikes. My good friend confided in me that she did, in fact, wear panties to the dance because she had a bit of a cold, and peed everytime she had a coughing spell. That sounded valid to me--not to mention the fact that the extra draft probably wouldn't have done her cold any good either. The no panty part didn't really bother me, since I rarely wear them anyway. I did, however, wear my skirt a bit longer than usual to compensate for the higher heels. I'm also quite good at crossing my legs demurely due to my early Catholic school upbringing. So I've got that going for me.
This is a people-watchers paradise. It's so fun to sit with a bunch of your best friends, get out the Meow Mix, and talk about everybody else. I'm sure there are other groups such as ours at the dance, talking about US, so it's all good. There were probably close to 150 people there of all ages, heavy on the aging Baby Boom class, of which I am a proud member, and some even older than that. Everyone dances their butts off with abandon. What a kick. It gets a little crazy, and let me tell you, some of these people really deserve credit for not giving a crap about what they do or how they look doing it...come to think of it, I deserve a fair amount of credit for that very thing myself, I guess! There are some women that really should wear panties, tho. I refer to one of the much older participants, probably around her late, verrry late, sixties, who wore not much more than a ruffle around her waist in lieu of a skirt. It was so wrong. Oh my god...and what is she doing now???? No, No, NO!!!!! NOT THE POLE! PLEASE!! In the name of all that is holy....NOT THE POLE!!!! But pole dance she did, while we all stared, dumbfounded, until one of us said, "God Bless her, look at her go!" and we all laughed, realizing that she probably had her own midlife crisis twenty or so years ago too. It was kind of gross though. Makes you think. LOL. The guys didn't care , they all cheered for her as though she was twenty. Thats why I love the age I am now. You can let it all hang out (literally) and there is always someone who appreciates you. It's still like high school, but everyone is much kinder, much friendlier, because we realize we are all in the same boat, so we may as well enjoy it before it sinks. Life is good.

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